My entry for the Weekly Writing Challenge: Great Expectations
I expect the sun to rise each morning. I expect to walk around my beautiful neighborhood before work. I expect that the trees are filling up a little more each day. I expect Bakewell to be open. I expect that they will have oatmeal cookie lattes. I expect that Lily will be pulling at her cage to run free when I return home.
I expect the day to be uneventful. I expect to be disappointed by a coworker or loved one. I expect that I will try to write, and struggle. I expect yoga to make me feel better.
Expectations and true happiness remind me of the fortune in Harry Potter: “Neither can live while the other survives.” When you expect certain things, you set yourself up for disappointment. Or you expect disappointment, and simply cannot be happy.
Sometimes clouds block out the sun. There’s the chance I’m not feeling well and can’t walk around before work. Maybe something happened and Bakewell is closed.
Even just writing this made me realize how sad I become when thinking about what I expect from a day, from those around me, and from myself. During the last few months, I have tried to live in the moment more, and that’s sometimes hard. With regards to my finances, health, and career, I think it’s fine and necessary to set goals and have expectations to live up to. Everything else should be left to the moment.
I feel like expectations are oftentimes big, elaborate scenarios. Even if you reach the expectation of marrying the love of your life, writing that great American novel, having two babies and a rescue pup, I expect that the reality won’t be as sweet tasting as the vision that lived for so long in your mind. Expectations breed disappointment.
Right now, there is a co-worker disappointing me. My Greek yogurt is delicious. I can’t wait to eat this chocolate-covered caramel bunny. There are annoyances and beauty in each moment. And in this moment, I’m ok with both.